John 20:19-23 When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors of the house where the disciples had met were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”
Reflection What does it mean to reveal our wounds to someone? I believe it means being vulnerable, admitting we have been bruised, injured, possibly disabled and in Jesus’ case, killed. It means we are essentially damaged goods, not idealized specimens of humanity. This is not the picture of ourselves that we want to show the world. We would rather put on airs or armor striving to appear whole and healthy, undamaged and strong, anything but vulnerable.
So we cover our bodies and lock the doors of our hearts hoping against hope to hide our wounds. We fear that if we reveal them, someone might poke their fingers into them and our fragile armor will crumble. And there we will stand before God and all of creation, stripped of our fig leaf, exposed and defenseless. Who wants to go there?
But Jesus punctuates the revelation of his wounds with breathy bookends. “Peace be with you. Peace be with you.” God’s peace is with us before we are wounded. God’s peace is with us after we are wounded. There is never a time when God’s peace is not with us because with his next breath, Jesus breathes on the disciples and us saying, “Receive the Holy Spirit.
How are we to understand the Holy Spirit? There are three sphere of action for the Holy Spirit; in creation and the unfolding of history (the Spirit has always been present), in the Christ event revealed through Jesus (this singular moment), and continuing in the world at large (omnipresent and ongoing). Here is the thing. All three spheres of the divine, sweeping, all-embracing and ecumenical action of the Holy Spirit lean toward one thing; the transformation of our consciousness and community into the peaceable kingdom of God, inside and out.
Which brings us to Jesus’ next acclamation. “If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”Here we note that forgiveness is not solely about being magnanimous toward the person we believe has offended, bruised, damaged or disabled us physically or emotionally. Forgiveness is above all about its effect on us. For as long as we cling to the sin of others, we are locked in a room defending our wounds which means we lose access to the deep transforming peace of the Spirit of God with us.
For as long as we lock our doors to cover up the negative emotions associated with our wounds (anger, shame, resentment, hatred, jealousy, outrage), like an infection that refuses to heal, the emotions fester and chafe inside us. But when we reveal our wounds, like a skin leison exposed to the sun’s ultraviolet rays produces vitamin D that enhances healing, when we reveal our wounds the outreaching, intercessory and unifying power of the Spirit of God is released from within us renewing our life and restoring our relationships which of course frees us to experience the peaceable kingdom of God, inside and out.
I believe the life changing success of 12 Step recovery programs that Bill Wilson and his physician, Bob Smith began in 1935 is largely due to the insistence that participants examine themselves and expose the exact nature of their wounds and wrongs. Exposing our wounds to light, releases the power of the Holy Spirit to conceive the peaceable kingdom of God, inside and out. At Pentecost Jesus shows us the way to be at peace with our wounds and receive the Holy Spirit.
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